Things that make you go...eeewwww!!

I shop for fruits and vegetables at a place known by the expats as (and it is aptly named) the "stinky market". The produce is lovely, the smell, not so much. It is a place where people spit in the very place you walk...a place where sometimes you might have to wake the vendor as they take a power nap on top of the lettuce...a place where just one aisle over you could purchase delicacies ranging from the head of a goat, cow spine, or unlucky mutt...it is a place where I have "a fruit lady" - this means I buy all my fruit from her and she usually throws in something extra for me like overripe bananas or something exotic that I have no name for, nor do I know how to eat it. Occasionally my "fruit lady" doesn't have what I am looking for or the seller next to her has better looking apples. This is a dilemma...I, white-skinned, round-eyed, brown-haired and wearing an orange winter coat can hardly blend in! So it is that I have to be sly and cautious so as not to offend the one that previously let me pick the untouched oranges in the box behind her stand or who threw some lychees in my bag for free. In the stinky market (and in any produce market of this type), you must carry small, often "moist" bills, and be ready to understand when they tell you in lightening-speed Chinese how much you owe (I have gotten good at this!). Fortunately, what you owe is remarkably cheap and the produce is fresh - you might call this "the silver lining" in a damp and smelly cloud.

I AM actually getting to what will end up being a short story but first I wanted to paint an accurate picture of shopping in a local produce market. Have I been successful? Are you with me? Do you get that it is not just shopping...it's an experience??!

The topic of my story is the one thing I did leave out of this picture: it has to do with the shopper's inevitable encounter with something moving, wriggling, squirming amongst the produce. There are entire boxes of these moving, wriggling, squirmers...they are silkworms. Oh, the first few sightings will be benign because you are overwhelmed by the sights, the smells, the piles and piles of fresh fruits and vegetables. Then there will be the day when you happen by them and say, "What the @*##?? They're MOVING!" The ones in the picture below look innocent enough skewered as they are but trust me...they are...well...eeeewww!!

A recent shopping experience led me to the only stand in the stinky market where I can get 'normal' mushrooms. Unfortunately I have to reach over the squirming silk worms to get to them. So there I was reaching, holding my bag up as high as I could so as not to accidentally touch the worms - I was carefully placing mushrooms in the bag when I dropped a mushroom in among the living. Now, I know how melodramatic this sounds but before I could get my "I'm an adult" bearings, I let out a little yelp and physically gagged at the prospect of having to fetch my mushroom (which I did not). I swiftly handed the seller my bag and paid her the money. All the while she was smirking at me like I was ridiculous...this is likely a reasonable, understandable assessment of which I am not proud. It is what it is...I am what I am...

Next time you're in your local supermarket, give that produce manager a pat on the back, an 'atta boy/girl', a "Gosh I appreciate the clean surroundings and that the only wriggling and squirming comes from the child strapped in the shopping cart."